Suddenly, that horrible, painful memory came back to haunt me and that painful experience kept creeping up on me throughout the day. “Why am I thinking about this so much?” After all these years, why am I being reminded of this awful encounter again and again? I just couldn’t shake it. Over the few days following, I would think of the incident and my heart would break. I would try to not think about it too much; hoping it would just ‘go away’. I kept thinking “Why am I thinking of this NOW?“. I don’t know How To Cope With Painful Memories!
But the memory just would not leave my thoughts.
Has that ever happened to you? You are doing something ordinary, just going about your day, maybe even humming a happy tune…then something triggers a memory that you’d rather keep swept under that rug. Try as you might, you just can’t continue on normally without that anguished recollection at the forefront of your mind. What do you do with that? Today, I am sharing with you How To Cope With Painful Memories.
Finally, I realized why I was remembering this hurt.
I had prayed for something specific the day before I remembered the incident.
I had asked God for more healing in a particular area of my life. Have you ever asked God for that?
Hmmm…ok. I KNOW that is a prayer He will gladly answer since it is what brings Him glory. However, when I prayed that prayer, I forgot what comes with healing. Getting ‘dirty’ is necessary for good, deep healing. And things were about to get messy.
Now I knew what that meant. It meant heart WORK! Which is HARD work!
Willing To Be Healed
I was going to have to open up that deeply wounded part of my heart and allow Jesus in to do His healing work.
And that is HARD!
Questions flooded my mind.
I felt overwhelmed with them all.
How do I go about healing this intense wound?
What steps do I need to take?
What do I do first?
How do I know the healing was worked?
So many questions!
But I can’t get caught up in these worries. I need to believe that Jesus will take care of the healing. I just need to first open up to Him and let Him into that painful place. He needs to come in, like only He can, and pick up those broken shards and hold them in His nail-scarred hands.
It’s not easy letting someone else hold your mess. It’s not like just anyone can be trusted with those delicate pieces. But Jesus isn’t just ‘someone’. He is the One.
Essential Steps for Healing
I don’t think there is a 5-step, or 10-step, or 156-step process that works every single time for every single wound. But, I do believe that we must bring it all to Jesus and allow Him to lead us in our healing.
He knows our hearts the best. He is the expert on the healing process. He knows how to restore.
Taking His lead, you will never go wrong in healing.
From my own experience, though, there are some essentials to healing.
- I must completely and fully allow Jesus into that hurt. I need to process it with Him. I must not fear being in that dark place with Him. He illuminates the darkness and He redeems it!
- I must look to Him for truth. This includes meditating on scripture and reminding myself of my identity in Him. Every time I think of the incident, I need to combat it with Truth. This is one reason why it is so important to have God’s Word written upon my heart. Knowing His Truth will help me to destroy the lies that are being whispered to my heart. I keep a journal of important verses as well as beautiful quotes that express Truth for easy reference. I have printed them on different colours of paper and pasted them in my Smashbook journal and I have made small cards from them attached to a binder ring (pasted onto scrapbook paper and embellished with ribbons, stickers, glitter, etc make wonderful gifts!). Example photos are below.
- I must have patience with the process and not rush it. Any kind of healing takes time and work. Jesus is the salve for my wound and I need to keep applying Him daily.
- I must FORGIVE. This is absolutely necessary in order for thorough healing to take place. Keep in mind that forgiveness is a process and many times one needs to choose forgiveness over and over. Forgiveness takes one, reconciliation takes two. I also have to remember that reconciliation isn’t always possible. Especially if that person continues to sin against me. Forgiveness does not mean what the person did was ‘ok’. I have written 4 posts that deal with the idea of forgiveness since it can be a misunderstood concept.
- Forgiveness Is The Key To Freedom
- 2 Myths About Forgiveness
- 3 Truths About Forgiveness
- The Idea Of Forgiveness and Reconciliation
So, I have begun a new journey of deeper healing.
I KNOW from the healing He has already done in my life that He is so faithful in repairing, restoring and redeeming the heart of those He loves.
What is your plan for healing?
What is hindering you from approaching God for additional healing?
Do you keep a journal of some type for recording your healing journey?
How about worship songs? I love the stirring in my soul that a worshipful song brings Some of my favourites are below:
Tell Your Heart To Beat Again – Danny Gokey
Have Your Way – Britt Nicole.
Forgiveness – Matthew West
Hallelujah – Heather Williams
Mystery – Charlie Hall
Jesus I my cross have taken – Enfield
And, just in case you have forgotten – you are GOLD (Britt Nicole). You just might have to get up and DANCE to this song!!
Don’t lose heart, dear sister. Healing takes time. Draw close to the Saviour. When He brings those painful memories to the surface, He is telling you that He wants to heal it.
He is telling you that your heart is ready for redemption.
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